last night till this afternoon was bad. kenneth's sad story of somebody precious made my night even more depressing. and i was slipping effortlessly into another realm thats beckoning to me. i stare into space and i cannot concentrate. i carried a frown through lunchtime today, my mother says she hates lunch with me. i carried a frown in the car when my dad dropped my mum in town. as i see her walk away from the car, walking towards the shopping mall, i thought " mother goes shopping. daughter goes school. how wonderful." i was sitting still at the bus stop at st michaels road before deciding that " okay, i am too stressed to go to school. " ridikulous ( read. ridiculous). i texted wenling. " are you at home. "

i got a bloody time management problem. i needed a breather, i wanted to run to wenling's house and pour out all the woes in the world. but i still went to school anyway.

it was during my journey to school that i realised that i have to embrace my life whether i like it or not. i suspect that i may be the one who built that wall to block the sun.

i sat through 3 hours of lecture. i didn't bring my lecturebooks. i took notes on foolscape paper.

kenneth, thank you for the little text. " wishes do come true ", yours too. hang on there with architecture design and whatnot crap. stef, 8 days since i saw your kamgong face. i think i miss the aimless walks with you in town and at parkway; i don't know about you. i had so much time to waste then. saturday we will go to marina square. can we have porkchop rice before that ? pei ru, i have returned the SQ21 book punctually to the library. one month since we met, i will pass you the goodies from japan this sunday. can we have buffet style. i don't want to walk. i just want to talk. i need to fill you in; complains, stories, and all that i always tell you. wenling, i hope endlicheri will have her new coat of paint soon. take care of your arm. i will pass my driving test, and we will tide through this shit together.

jac is coming back to singapore for her birthday this saturday. " hello emily the strange. this is shanghai speaking. i must see you in singapore. " there, another reason to be happy.

to end off. one of the top quotes of 2006. wenling says

" good looking people you like. wear specs you like. good literary talent you also like. "